Reflection Questions (continued)

I am just three days away from leaving for Israel and Palestine. I was there in 1999, and one of my most vivid memories of that trip was the dry, barren Judean desert or wilderness. I can well imagine Jesus out there, coming to grips with what he felt called to do, all alone so that he could wrestle with himself and God about these things. And the tempter. When do I do that wrestling? Often my wilderness is the middle of the night. It is quiet, but my thoughts often are not. Here is where I often find that I put together my thoughts, connect dots that I could not connect during the daylight, make decisions, and decide to let God be God when I realize once again that I am not in control. Here in the wilderness my faith is stretched and grows if I let it. Wrestling. What verb would you use for what goes on in your wilderness? Brian

Reflection Questions

Question number 4: When you imagine a wilderness experience, what emotions stir in you? I think for me there is a mixture of excitement and fear. The adrenaline starts pumping. If I pray, I gain a sense of peace. I still know there is danger, but prayer helps me get back in touch with my center connected to God. Then creativity starts to stir. New ideas begin to come. I am more open to others who might join me on the wilderness journey. I also know that without sojourns through the wilderness, I stop exploring life, and I stop developing what God has placed within me. So the wilderness is a gift--not that I always want to accept it! What is the wilderness like for you?

Brian

Angels

I am almost over the respiratory infection that started last Monday. The antibiotics have taken effect. But I know that through this last week and a half I have been sustained by angels while tackling a Sunday sermon, Ash Wednesday service, and multisensory service. People who made sure I at least slowed down somewhat ("Do you listen to God?" one said. "Slow down!") People who came through for worship services and caring for our people. At the Ash Wednesday service, we sang Kyrie Eleison several times to the beautiful melody of Dvorak's New World Symphony. I could hardly sing. But I didn't need to. I felt carried aloft by the voice of the congregation. (Like angels, but better!) After all, we clergy are not the church. The church is the church, laity and clergy together. Thanks be to God! Where have you experienced the angelic touch in your wilderness?

Brian

Wild Beasts (continued)

Sarah writes that "a middle ground exists between total control and total chaos" (pg. 24). This is where wildness is harnessed - where what could be potentially dangerous, damaging or hurtful, is managed in such a way that it actually brings about creative energy and life. Dee Lee reflected on this and pointed out the ways in which something like humor can be hurtful, but can also be used to bring joy in life. So we manage those things towards more life affirming directions. Moving from the extremes towards a manageable middle.

How is your prayer life going? What has the experience of taking 10-15 minutes a day in solitude been like? Worship tonight at 7pm will be on different forms of prayer, with the opportunity to experience and practice them. Hope to see you there!

- Melanie

Wild Beasts

Flinging our negative feelings off a cliff. As I read this section of the book, I was reminded of the kayaking trip I took with the young adults last summer. We went to the Apostle Islands up in Lake Superior. We kayaked out to Sand Island, and after setting up camp, decided to go exploring. We took a hike to the tip of the island where there was a lighthouse. One of the spiritual exercises we did was to hike in silence, looking for an object along the way that represented something that brought us great sorrow, or was weighing on us. When we got to the lighthouse, we threw our objects out into the great lake, representing our letting go of the weight and sadness, of offering our worries to God. Well, I chose a plant stem with three leaves on it representing some of my worries, and I flung the stem into the air towards the water, and the strong wind blew the stem of leaves right back at me - and it stuck to my shirt, right where my heart was. I was more than a little annoyed by this, so I tried again, and a SECOND time, the same thing happened! Here I was trying to fling my sadness away and it just kept blowing right back to my heart. At the time I thought, well, it's probably better to pick something with a little more weight to it if you want it to go out to sea. But perhaps the point was what Sarah seemed to be saying - instead of flinging them away, we are invited during Lent to sit with our emotions and keep company with them for awhile in our hearts. I'd like to hear what you think about Sarah's questions - as we relate to our emotions, who are these creatures? How do we relate to them? Have we tried to kill them? What help or friendship might they offer us? (pg. 24)

- Melanie

Temptations

It's easy to identify and talk about temptation when we're talking about that three layer chocolate cake at Cafe Latte that seems to call out from the case everytime I eat there. Or the temptation I have whenever I exercise to run on the treadmill for ten minutes and quit, calling it a "full" workout.

It's harder to admit to oneself and even harder to share with others the deeper temptations that we face. Sarah says we have a tendency to make ourselves like God - "minigods". One thing we struggle with is our desire for control. I have a special antidote to manage my desire for order. No matter how much planning I put into a children's sermon, I have no control over what will happen in front of hundreds of people each Sunday. I might ask a question and get no response at all. I might ask a question about God's love and get a response of, "My kitty died yesterday and I have to go to the bathroom." I'm reminded each and every Sunday that I have limited control over what will happen, that chaos is just part of life (and it can be a wonderful part of life!), so I may as well embrace it instead of trying to reign it in! God is infinite, I am not. In what other ways do we tend to try and make ourselves like God?

Melanie